8 April ’08, 12 midnight…
Cannot sleep… although mata pedih sangat tapi still cannot sleep.
A lot happen today. I cried a lot. From morning till evening. I cried at the toilet, at the surau after pray & so on.
Mata bengkak. Felt so down today. Wish my parents are with me now. Usually, when this kind of thing happen to me, I’ll not tell others especially my parents coz if I tell them, they will be worried. Especially my dad. Suka sangat risau pasal I. So, in order not to make them risau, I just keep what happen to myself. Cry is the best way to let it go. Sometimes, I want to tell someone about what had happen to me… but… hmm.. I feel that maybe nobody will be interested to listen. Can’t believe that I’m crying now. I’m so sad… so sad.. so sad… Mama… Ayah… can you hear me?... can you feel what I’m feeling now?.. I just feel so alone now… so sad… so down… just wish that I can hug my mum & dad… wish they can comfort me… but no…. it won’t happen.
All I can say to myself now… just be strong. It’s life.. got ups & down. Stop crying!! Everything will be alright tomorrow. It’s not the end of the world. Don’t let this small thing ruin your life. You can do it!! Just be strong!!
Huh… I just can’t stop crying now. Why this happen to me???? Did I do something wrong???

So, tomorrow, people will see me laughing without knowing what had happen to me today….